Have you ever felt like you were up to your eyeballs in media?  I have.  Then a twenty-something year old friend brought me back to reality.  Lets face it, the NET is here to stay.  However, if we’re  going to succeed in not only our personal lives, but our business lives as well, something’s got to change.

You’re not the only one fed up with phones and computers.  Then why is it, we try to reach people with the very tools we hate to use ourselves.  No, you don’t have to do a media detox, but it might help.  While you’re at it, start looking for opportunities to have more REAL FaceTime in the form of face to face conversations.  “Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend”.  Proverbs 27:17.  Is it any wonder we’ve grown dull?  There is still nothing like a heart to heart talk with a friend we’ve known for a long time.  While you’re at it, why not make a new one?

What if in 2016 your goal became ‘I want to meet new and interesting people’, instead of ‘I want to make $100,000.00″?  Does that mean you would have to abandon Social Media or blow up your phone?  No.  But a good place to start might be where actual people congregate.  You might even ask some of your friends to introduce you to someone who shares your common interests.  After all, who better to make a recommendation than someone you’ve known for a long time?

Business wise, the same principle applies.  Look for opportunities to meet new people and don’t be afraid to tell them what you do for a living….especially if you’re self-employed.  If you’re feeling real brave, why not ask for a referral?  If you’re a pastor, you might say something like.  “Jean, as you know, a large part of my occupation depends on meeting and connecting with new people.  Do you know of anyone who might be interested in what our church has to offer?”  You’re not being pushy when you ask questions like this, you’re being proactive.  If your product or offering is life changing, why keep it to yourself?

In most cases, people are not going to just come and knock on your door.  You have to get outside the box.  You can spend 60 hours a week in your office working on your social media platform, tweaking your website and cleaning your building and people still won’t show up.  You can read every book under the sun.  But something amazing happens when you go to where they are.  That’s what Jesus did and it still works today.

While you’re meeting new people or potential customers, why not give them a sample of your product?  If you’re in the life changing business, why not help them solve one of their most taxing problems over a cup of coffee?  Give them opportunities to ask questions?  You’d like that, right?

And while you’re at it, don’t look for quick results.  You may have some immediate response, but plan on being in it for the long haul.  Look at it like your planting a field, not popping something in the microwave.  Good things take times.  New friendships and prospects take a bit of cultivation.  Trust has to be built.  God may work, but sometimes his methods take time.  Seeds don’t pop up overnight, unless of course they’re weeds.

But something even more amazing will happen other than an increase in friends and prospects.  You’ll get your life back.  You’ll find yourself doing something other than sitting in front of your computer wishing there was someone to talk to.  With any amount of grace, you won’t be wondering how you’re going to pay the mortgage or keep your business going.

So look for changes to come in 2016!  But most importantly, initiate the change yourself.  Decide today that while you may not abandon your computer or phone, you’re going to start being more intentional about keeping it real with real people.  If you’re an introvert, that’s o.k.  Many others have achieved these types of goals.  You don’t have to know what you’re going to say to people.  Most times they’re just looking for someone to listen.  Now get off the computer and get going!

Have you ever wondered why some people seem to have all of the luck? I’ve been there. It’s so easy to take a look around and see people finding success in areas that you are failing in. Social media only exacerbates the problem. Rarely do people post about their failures, all we get to see are their highlight reels.

So how do you change anything?

When it comes to change, we don’t lack willpower, we are just blind in certain areas of our lives. This is important to understand because willpower can only take you so far. More than willpower, you need to have a plan and educate yourself if you’re going to reach your goals.

More than a plan and personal education, you need social support. You need to be around people who know your dream and are cheering for you. Likewise, you may have to disassociate with people who want to sabotage your plan. These people are easy to recognize because they say things like: “You’ve changed” or “You never cared before”, not to mention the classic jab: “What, are you, too good for us?”

Once you examine your own weaknesses and temptations, you are are ready to map out a plan. Write down the necessary steps that have to be taken. Come up with more than one way you are going to counter the things that tend to make you deviate from making a bee line to your goal. For example, you may set up alarms on your cell phone to remind you of your vulnerable times. Or, you might wear a rubber band on your wrist and snap it every time you find yourself thinking self- defeating thoughts.
While you’re at it, make plans to reward yourself when you reach incremental goals. Promise to buy yourself that new book on Friday if you’ve reached your goal for the week. Rewarding and punishing yourself along the way will help you stay on track.

Sooner or later, despite your best efforts, you will fall. Get back up again and keep on going. Learn from your mistakes. Take the information you’ve learned from your failure and use it to better refine your plan.

Change is hard work. If you don’t roll up your sleeves and get to work on your plan, you’ll get rolled up in the motions of just getting by. Don’t depend on the things that have helped others, customize a plan that is going to work for you. You don’t have to run 5 miles a day like your neighbor, maybe a brisk walk every other day is a better fit.

Studies have shown that most plans work: the problem is most people never work their plan. You don’t have to be one of the 98% who make a New Years resolution and blow it by February 1st. Find a plan that works for you and stick to it.

You don’t have to go it alone; I’ve written a book to help you begin your journey called “Life Coaching: 7 Myths Keeping You From Your Best Year Yet.”  The book is available in Kindle and print on Amazon.com.

In the meantime, I’d love to hear any thoughts you might have on this topic.