Do you ever feel addicted? Not just to drugs, but anything? It can be food, words of affirmation, the internet.  You’re not alone, and chances are you sometimes wonder what the line is between normal and addicted.  Lets talk.

You may have first noticed how much you like control, when you started establishing some rituals and routines.  Maybe you set your alarm clock for 6:00 a.m every day.  Maybe you run every other day.  You eat a light breakfast and read your bible and pray. Then you work on some kind of project until it’s time to go to work.  Sounds harmless, right?

Actually,  it still may be a good thing.  You probably feel 100 percent better.  You have more energy to spend with your kids. Things are happening at church.  You’re meeting new and interesting people.  You’ve steered clear of the ruts.  And you’ve tacked on some major hours to each day, right?

However, are you beginning to realize just how good it feels to accomplish something?  We all like control.  We can even get to the point where we enjoy walking into a darkened room and flicking the light switch ‘on’.  We like finishing the last few swigs of milk and filing the jug in the recycle container. Crazy, right?

If we’re completely honest with ourselves, it’s amazing how much joy we can get out of completing the smallest of tasks. Drug free. O.k, not including caffeine.

So what is the fine line between addiction and control?

Well, it’s probably different for everyone, otherwise it wouldn’t be fine.

Take cell phones for example. They’re great. Wonderful tools. Nothing will give you more joy than one that hums.  New updates only increase their hand in glove feel. However, what wonderful servants they make and terrible taskmasters.  We can all relate.  We’ve all binged and suffered for it.

But what is binging? Is it healthy to tell yourself, “You’re addicted!” or “You’re in control!”.   When it’s a question of addiction, you’re left to feel like the Schnauzer who gets caught red-handed.  There you are wolfing down your owners French Fries while she’s gone to the rest room. True? Maybe. But not healthy.

What if you discovered it’s a control issue.  For instance, if you keep telling yourself you have no control, chances are you’ll start believing it.  

Lets just call this Iic: I’m in control, from here on out.

Iic keeps you in the realm of personal responsibility.  It’s not a free pass to be immoral. No.  It leaves you with the power to make the right choice for you and all other parties involved.

IA (I’m addicted) is a recipe for failure. Yes, it’s a good starting point on the road to recovery, but it gives you an excuse to be irresponsible. All of us are irresponsible from time to time. That’s not the issue. The issue arises when you use your own words to harm yourself.

You’re of no use to yourself or your loved ones until you change the stories you tell yourself.

How about you? Is negativity in your interior space keeping you from solving your problems. Maybe there’s something healthy going on inside and you can only see it as a problem. Wonders might happen if you recognize this attribute and begin to see it in others. You might just end up winning the Nobel Peace Prize after all. What’s the saying? If you can imagine it, you can do it. Put a man on the moon? Impossible. Put 1,000 songs in everyone’s pocket? Impossible. Turn out to be an authority in your field. Impossible. Maybe not!

Nobody or thing has more control over your past, present, and future more than you do! O.k, after God. It’s not your boss oppressing you, or your wife and friends, sometimes it’s you.  You can be real nice to a lot of other people but not very nice to yourself. You can be a good friend to others, but when’s the last time you were a friend to yourself?

Who’s going to be a better friend to you than you?  Unless you’re a Siamese twin, you’re going to be spending a lot of time with yourself from here on out. Why not be friendly to yourself? Like McDonald’s says: “You deserve a break today”, right?

We call ourselves overachievers, but the truth is we can be under encouragers.

Remember, Yic (You’re in control). Not anybody else. Not your boss. Not your husband or your wife.  What you do with that control is up to you. Can you become addicted? Absolutely. If you can’t stop being kind to yourself, you’re not in control any more.

Conversely, when you begin to realize just how much control you have, amazing things begin to happen. So, who determines the fine line between addiction and control? You and me, my friend. So why not be kind to yourself? Flick the switch!