Development vs. Destination

Family vacations.  Two short words that take you back in time in an instant.  If you had to travel any amount of distance, one question always popped up before you reached your destination, “Are we there yet?”  Maybe you’re asking yourself that same question right now and wondering if you’ll ever arrive.


There’s nothing wrong with making plans and setting deadlines.  In fact, dreams without deadlines are only  delusion.  The rub is it sometimes takes longer to get to our destination than you anticipated.

For example, when it comes to raising children, it’s so easy to imagine your family is going to look picture perfect just like the stock photos.  You know, the one where everyone’s hair is perfect and everyone’s teeth are white and straight and everyone appears to be a perfect representative of their age group.

Things are different in the real world.  In the real world there is heartache.  In the real world, children rebel.  In the real world, parents exhaust themselves trying to put food on the table.  In the real world, families struggle.  And in the real world it seems like you’ll never reach your final destination.  Like you’ll never achieve your greatest dreams.  Like you’ll never achieve the measure of success you’re seeking.  But what if there’s hope?

There’s nothing wrong with thinking about your goals, dreams and final destination.  What’s wrong is expecting to achieve anything worth achieving over night.

So what’s the solution?  Glad you asked!  Focus on developing, not your destination.

Focusing on the final product rather than the journey breeds frustration.  Asking ‘Are we there yet?’ is natural.  Here are some better questions.

Am I more spiritually minded than I was a year ago?

Am I more patient with my spouse than I was last month?

Is my current course of action taking me closer toward my goal or farther away from it?

Do I spend more quality AND quantity time with my children than I did last month?

All good things take time and you will not reach the next level over night, BUT….you should be making progress.

So, the next time you get frustrated with your family, job, or career, remember this simple truth- Focus on your development, not your destination.  You’ll be glad you did.  Are we there yet?


Please note: I reserve the right to delete comments that are offensive or off-topic.

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