Have you ever looked back at a time in your life when you felt really successful but in reality you were not?  I have and here are some thoughts on this subject.  Hopefully you can avoid some of the pitfalls I’ve fallen into.

The real problem with success is it’s a moving target.  Or it can be.  You start out thinking of something that will make you really happy.  For instance, more money, marriage, a career…whatever it may be.  Then once you achieve your goal you find out it isn’t quite as satisfying as you thought it would be.  It’s like buying a car and having the new smell evaporate just about the time the first monthly payment is due.

The natural thing to do after this happens is to seek out another goal.  To be healthier, hipper, wealthier, wiser.  None of these are bad things.  In fact, they are rather good things.  Who doesn’t want a nicer house or a bigger bank account.  The problem is when we focus on the destination, we tend to miss out on the journey.

So what is your thing right now?  A better job?  A healthier you?  The best Summer you’ve ever had?  I’ll bet that isn’t a very difficult question for you.  Especially if you live in the West.  Here, life consists of constantly reaching higher and further to achieve something.  First you’re born.  Then you go to school. Then you go to college.  Then you get a job.  Then you get married.  Then you have children.  Then your children have children.  Then you retire.  Then…

If we’re not careful, we can spend so much time focusing on the future that we miss out on the now.

When was the last time you just stopped everything you were doing and celebrated right where you are now?

You may be going through a really difficult season right now.  It may be your marriage.  Or your job.  Or your health.  Or your kids… However, that doesn’t mean it’s the end of the world.  If you quit right now that would be a tragedy.  Chances are this will be just a blip on your journey and you have to decide if you’re going to falter or use this as an opportunity to grow.

The bottom line isn’t what you have or what you have done.  The bottom line is who you are becoming regardless of these things. 

In fact, the biggest challenge isn’t who you become after you fail.  Perhaps the biggest challenge is who you will become after you succeed.  I like the response Eugene Peterson gave when an interviewer asked what his plans for the next day were.  In fine fashion, he answered, “I’m thinking about who I’m going to eat with and how I’m going to treat them”.

Think about how many people who allowed fame and fortune to destroy them.

I have to confess that I haven’t always treated people the way I’d like to be treated.  In fact, that’s really been true when I was trying to be more than I was or looking for more of something.   In some cases it meant helping myself to things that I had a right to but didn’t necessarily need.

In the words of a good friend, “We just try all our lives to be more than we are where we’re at”.  Without getting into all the inner workings of this dilemma and how it works, perhaps it’s easier just to look at someone who escaped the temptation.

After Jesus had fasted 40 days and 40 nights the Devil tempted him.

 ^“The tempter came to him and said, “If you are the Son of God, tell these stones to become bread.”  Matthew 4:3.  In other words, if you are who you say you are, prove it.  Do something magical.  Unless you do, we won’t believe you.  If you don’t, you probably can’t.  We, however, say things like, “I’ll show them!  I’ll prove myself.

 Jesus answered, “It is written: ‘Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God”.  Matthew 4:4 

In the case of Jesus, he proved the devil wrong.  He had reached the point in his life where he had nothing to prove.  Nothing, Nada, zero!  He was comfortable in his own skin and that my friend is the true definition of success!  It’s not about what you have or what you can do.  These things can change in an instant.  It’s about who we’ve become and who we’re becoming.  That’s the bottom line.  

In the words of a wise woman, “People won’t remember what you said or did, but they will remember how you made them feel”.

There are many you love and care for but let’s be honest.  It doesn’t matter what they’re net worth is or what they can do that’s important to you.  What matters is who they are.  You love them for who they are, not what they can do or how much they’re worth.  You love them because they’re irreplaceable one-of-a-kind people.  And you love them because of who they are.

In fact, I’m willing to bet that they’ve been through all kinds of hurts and heartaches and that’s what makes you love them even more.

My friend, you don’t have to put a mask on to impress people.  You don’t have to impress them with your bank account or your car.  They could probably care less about your talent or your abilities.  What they care about is you.  And that’s the bottom line.